There are so many ‘buzz words’ circulating around. Stonewalling is one of them. What does that mean and how does it contribute to conflict? The Everything DiSC® Productive Conflict Reference Guide describes it this way:
“When we stonewall, we make it clear to the other person that communication is completely shut down. We deliberately let them know that their behavior is so unacceptable that we are unwilling to compromise or even discuss a resolution. And although we may hate to admit it, stonewalling can be gratifying. We get to punish the other person while telling ourselves that our behavior is strong and dignified. And, as a bonus, we don’t have to wade through the untidiness or conflict. Therefore, this can become a self-preservation strategy when we feel overwhelmed by a swirl of uncomfortable emotions. Ask yourself: What emotions am I hiding from when I do this?"
If you want a quick and assured way to break a relationship, stonewalling is the way to go. It is a way to run from addressing uncomfortable discussions, no matter how unacceptable you feel the other person’s behavior is. Avoiding conflict does not resolve it, actually it lingers and deepens with both the stonewaller and the stonewalled. Unless you are ready to walk away from the person you are in conflict with, remember that it takes courage, respect, and confidence to work towards a resolution, and stonewalling demonstrates none of these traits.
To view the previous blogs in this Productive Conflict series, click the links below:
You can find more information including a video on Everything DiSC® Productive Conflict here: HR Solutions | Everything DiSC Solution | Personality Assessments and Training (hrs-mt.com)
Contact me if your organization is struggling with conflict so we can discuss how we can be of help to you. HR Solutions | Contact Us (hrs-mt.com)
